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We know that one of the most difficult things about adoption is not having any control over when your child comes into your family. How do you endure the unknown wait? Rebekah shares her wonderful advice with us today on that subject. Thank you Rebekah for your beautiful words!

My name is Rebekah. My husband, Brian, and I have been married for 12 years and this January we were blessed with our first son through the miracle of adoption.

It was nine years in total from the time that we decided we were ready to expand our family until the day we came home with baby D. We spent 4 years trying to conceive before we found out that we just couldn’t, then we spent a year and a half mourning our loss and deciding which avenue we would pursue next. Another year passed before we were financially ready to apply for adoption, and then we waited for 2.5 years and were with 2 agencies before we were finally contacted by our son’s birth mom.

I was blessed with a great husband who made sure that those 9 years of waiting time were productive, fun, enriching, and fulfilling. We grew closer together and traveled the world. So many of my friends going through this put off big trips and dreams while waiting for a baby. I’m so thankful we didn’t do that. Instead, we crossed things off our bucket lists, like touching the pyramids and kissing the Blarney Stone. We took last minute trips to Sea World and midnight runs to the grocery store for the ingredients to make crepes. We ran a successful company together and did a lot of traveling for work. I went back to school. We made all that time while it was just the two of us mean something. Of course, it wasn’t always easy or fun. During all that time, we went through Christmases, mother’s days and father’s days, grandparents’ funerals, siblings baby showers, etc. that were often quite painful. Year after year we would approach New Year’s Eve and I would think, maybe this next year will be “the year.” And year after year I would find myself with more and more years behind me that weren’t “the year.” It began to feel like maybe it would just never happen. I mean, really, at what point do you just accept that this is your life??

And then, one random day, we got the email that would change everything. Our son’s birth parents were so good to us! We got to know them through emails, texts, and visits. They invited us to Dr. appointments to hear the baby’s heartbeat and shared ultrasound pictures with us. They invited us to be in the room for our son’s birth. And they signed their papers without hesitation, telling us that they’d known from the beginning that this baby boy was meant to be ours.

It was amazing! We had never experienced so much pure joy and peace before. From the minute we brought our little man home, all those years of waiting lost their length; it seemed like a dream. And all the memories of sadness and hurt and struggle lost their sting. All we could feel was immeasurable gratitude and joy. Although we still have all those memories and can remember all those feelings, they are softened and colored with the joy our son brought. The wait, though long and hard, was really just a moment – and so very worth it!